Hey, thanks for tuning in to Day 8 of Choosing Me. I’m really glad you’re here. I hope you’re sitting comfortably and ready to dive into self-sabotage together.
I want to talk about something that holds so many of us back — self-sabotage.
Not with tough love or expectations — just honesty, warmth, and a bit of understanding.
Because if I’m honest, a lot of my self-sabotage comes from a lack of self-belief. From anxiety. From feeling nervous before I’ve even started. From not feeling confident enough to trust myself with the process.
Sometimes it’s not the goal that scares me — it’s everything in between.
The unknown.
The what if I get it wrong
So instead of trying and because of the panic and fear that sets in , I pause. I delay. I tell myself “I don’t need it. I don’t want it. There are other ways.” And in the moment, that feels safer.
Let me ask you
What do you do when something really matters to you?
Do you overthink it until you feel frozen?
Do you avoid starting because the process feels nerve-racking?
Do you doubt yourself before you’ve even given yourself a chance?
You’re not weak for that. You’re anxious.
Self-sabotage often looks like:
Procrastinating when something truly matters to you
Quitting right before progress starts to show
Overthinking instead of taking the next small step
Talking yourself out of opportunities because not trying feels less scary
And the hardest part?
Avoiding the risk can feel like relief… but later it often turns into regret.
That quiet “what if?”
That feeling of knowing you didn’t fail — you just never let yourself try.
I’m not over this. Not yet.
But I am taking steps. I’m putting myself in uncomfortable situations, even when I don’t feel ready, and I’m petrified.
I’m not where I want to be — but I’m moving through it. Because I know from experience that even if I try and it doesn’t work out, I tried. And trying gives me experience. And next time, I might do it a little better.
Here’s something I’m learning, and maybe you are too:
A lack of confidence doesn’t mean you’re not capable; like me, you probably know you could do it if it were handed to you — it’s the process that feels overwhelming.
It just means you don’t trust yourself yet — and trust can be built.
You don’t need to be fearless. You just need to be willing.
And if today all you can do is recognise how uncomfortable it feels — that’s still progress.
If you’re reading this and thinking, “This is me,” then know this: you’re not alone in it. We’re sitting here together, reminding each other that growth is messy, anxiety is loud, and self-belief is something we practice — not something we magically have.
You’re not behind.
You’re not failing.
You’re becoming — even on the days you’re scared.
And that’s enough
If you feel able, share your desires. Share your fears.
Let’s walk this journey together.
This blog was created from a place of purpose — to support others, to hold space, and to remind you that you don’t have to do this alone.
Let me leave this with you: Practice mindfulness, notice your actions, forgive yourself — everyone makes mistakes, and you’re not too late.
Love Shana xx